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Wednesday, June 10, 2009

our 3rd child

THREE WADES?
I'm sure our blog address has puzzled many of you for a few years now! We originally titled this blog "3wades" when Cam was a small infant. Meaning, of course, Aaron, Cara, and Cam. Then when Bryce-E came along we just decided to include Harley, the dog, as one of the "3" children! Somehow the animal who once was the light of our life now only occasionally makes it onto the blog! But, because of recent happening we can officially say we truly are "3 wades". Many of you have probably heard, but don't know many details about our decision to begin the adoption process for a baby girl from China. This blog is now going to not only going to be dedicated to the adventures of Cam and Bryce, but also the journey we are taking to bring our daughter home. Let me explain how we got to this point in our lives. The seed was planted in my head in the mid 1990’s when China first opened up for foreign adoptions. I was in a sociology class in high school. I cannot specifically tell you what we were learning, but I know we briefly touched on China’s one child policy and the effect it was having on the already oppressed women and girls of China. My heart broke a little that day and I remember telling my friend that I will someday adopt from China. This is a memory I have stored and thought about often, therefore it very vivid to me. This is the beginning of many moments that made me realize adopting from China is in my destiny. Fast-forward about 10 years. I had since finished college and obtained a master’s degree in education in Speech-Language Pathology. This profession gives me the opportunity to learn and research what my current students are learning. In my first year of teaching I was working with a group of 4th graders who were learning about China. We discussed in great depth what the one-child policy means and how it is effecting the country. We specifically discussed the precious little girls that are left by their parents to be taken to orphanages. I now know, after much research, that many of the parents believe that either this is there only hope for their daughters, or economically they can’t afford to raise her on their own. At this time I was a newly wed and still childless. I began to educate Aaron about my hopes and dreams to build our family. He was very intrigued and just as heartbroken to think of these children without a home. A few years later I was attending a technology conference participating in a session about a specific movie making software used for educational purposes. The presenter showed a movie that a few high school girls had created using this specific software. The software was not what I remember learning about that day. The movie was much more intriguing. These girls, wise beyond their years, had created a very accurate and convicting film about China’s one-child policy. They had included a picture of a precious little girl who had been abandoned on the streets of Beijing. My whole being wanted to scoop that little girl up and just hold her and provide for her. Make her my own daughter. There is no doubt in my mind that these instances have been God making his plans for us known. It was about this time that Aaron and I decided it was time to build our family beyond the puppy we had adopted 3 years earlier (Harley). We were not eligible to begin a China adoption as we were both much too young. The China criterion for adoption specifically states both parents must be 30 to submit a Dossier. So, I became pregnant. We were overjoyed to find out it was a boy. At this time Aaron told me if our first two biological children were boys we would adopt a daughter from China. Camden Moses Wade was born on April 13th, 2006. He was the light of our life and we had not planned on having any more children for at least a few years. However, God had different plans. I quickly became pregnant again within the year. Half way into that pregnancy we learned we would have another son. I felt our destiny was sealed. It was on that day that I knew what our family would consist of . . . two blond little boys that would be close in age and one dark-haired Chinese daughter that would be much younger than both of them! We could all dote and give her love she needed and deserved. It was perfect! My adorable little Bryce Emmanuel Wade was born on December 14, 2007. As soon as the holiday decorations were put away that year I began my research into Chinese adoptions. So, here we are! Aaron and I are finally old enough to get started on the whole process. We are prepared for a long and tedious journey, but we know it will be well worth it when we can give a forever home to a little Chinese girl who otherwise would be destined to grow up in an orphanage. I lay awake at night literally fretting over how we are going to financially bring our daughter home. I do not even considerate it an option to give up and try to fill the tear in my heart with another biological child. I do not feel I can bring another child into this world knowing there are so many babies out there who need forever families. No obstacle will keep me from the daughter that may not even be conceived yet, but is already born and living in my heart. I am not sure how it is possible that I already feel a bond and yearning to hold somebody I do not know, but it is a feeling I feel as strong about as the wonderful little boys that I already have the privilege to physically see, love, and care for. So, now that I've opened up my heart and mind to all of you . . . I just ask for you continued prayers and blessings during this whole ordeal! I am currently working on what's called the "paper chase" part of the adoption. Once the paper chase is complete (hopefully by mid-December) we will have our paperwork (called a Dossier) sent to China. From here we just wait, and wait, and wait for a referral for our daughter. The current wait time at this point is about 39 months. This could lengthen or certainly shorten. Until then we will continue to live our lives!
Sincerely,
Cara

2 comments:

Leela's Mom said...

Yeah - so exciting! It's just so amazing to think that your family will be growing in such a great way! We will be praying for you but if you need anything else - let us know!

Dax and Ian said...

Cara,
You and your family remain in my thoughts and prayers through this process!! I'm so excited for you! You guys will give this little girl such a wonderful life! Congrats!! xoxo ~Becca